Is the fear of appearing imperfect holding you back in your business?What happens when a career-driven, ambitious entrepreneur falls pregnant and starts a family? Often times, she becomes a mumpreneur or ‘supermum’ and sometimes both!
The same fire that was lit still burns inside her after the children come. She still strives to create, to work, to be there for all the juicy moments of childhood, to do it all.
“If you want something done, ask a busy person.” – Benjamin Franklin
The upside of being superwoman is you get to perform minor miracles all the time. Just yesterday I launched a new product, interviewed for an online summit, booked a venue for my upcoming masterclass in London, kept my three-year-old twins from drowning each other in the bathtub, took care of a sick hubby and a stuffed gutter before the garage roof came down!
As super-mumpreneur people say to you all the time, “I don’t know how you do it all.” The answer normally is, “I just do it. It’s no big deal.”
The problem sets in when the mum is working herself to the bone, doing everything for everyone else around her, and never including herself in the picture. And it’s never enough! At the end of the day, she’ll think of all the laundry that didn’t get folded, the calls that didn’t get made, and the deadlines she missed.
We define being a ‘super mum’ as everything we think we are not. Notice that we never acknowledge ourselves for the miracles we perform…. it’s always the things we believe we are not doing good enough or the things we don’t think we don’t enjoy doing but believe we ‘should’ do.
This level of constant self-judgment can lead to burn out, fatigue, and even health problems, anxiety or depression.
We can take a lot of the responsibility on to make sure our children have the best lives possible, that they get every opportunity in life.
I remember on my 7th birthday, my mom spent 2 hours making the perfect icing for my birthday cake. She broke 2 mixers trying to whip up the fluffiest frosting and threw out 5 batches. Why? Did it make her a better mother? Did I care about the frosting? Did any of my friends care? No. I just wanted her to be happy. All I learned from that experience was that I was supposed to try to be perfect too.
Parents are looking from the outside in, at what other people’s judgments of ‘good” parents are around them. This could be attending every school activity, helping their kids do homework every night, or whatever else is considered “right” to do in their community.
What if parents stopped caring how they were seen and looked at what would actually work for their family?
Here are some tips for getting out of the mumpreneur perfectionism trap.
Acknowledge ‘what is’ with no judgment
This got done. This didn’t get done. My children screamed in the middle of my conference call for 45 minutes. I finally got that article written. I spent more than I wanted to on airfare because I waited too long to book the flight. Everything that occurs is neither right nor wrong, good nor bad, it just is what it is. Judging what happens only serves to lock it in place and doesn’t allow you to create beyond it.
For even more messy truths read the original article on Business Women Media HERE
Lauren Marie is a Joy of Business facilitator, acupuncturist, entrepreneur and mother of twins. She travels worldwide, facilitating classes and changing her clients’ point of view about life, health and business. Born on the outskirts of Washington D.C., Lauren now lives on Queensland’s Sunshine Coast. A passionate creator and conscious rule-breaker, Lauren seeks to inspire other mothers to see the possibilities others overlook and to embrace every challenge and choice that parenthood brings.
Find out more about Lauren Marie HERE