If you look around at all the how-to consultants and business cheerleaders out there today, you’ll almost always see big grinning faces and high-energy deliveries of everything that’s sugar and rainbows in the world. But we all know there are those times when it’s just not like that.
As much as it’s great to talk about all the ways that business can be successful and expansive and fun, some days you just want to crawl back into bed. What do you do with those times where nothing seems to be going right or you’re just plain grumpy?
When things don’t seem to be coming together, it’s easy to slip into conclusions and judgments about what’s wrong or how things should be going that amplify frustration and prolong the bad mood. In addition, trying to work from that place isn’t usually very generative for your business either.
Instead of just hiding under the blankets until the cloud passes, what other options do you have? Here are a few suggestions:
Let go of how you’ve decided everything should be.
If you’ve determined you should feel a certain way, as in you should be happy and positive, or focused and productive, take a step back and recognize how that expectation is locking you up. Anytime you’re operating from “should” is where things are poised to get off track.
Where else are you projecting expectations at yourself? How have you decided how your day or your family or your business should be? What about anywhere you’ve decided other things like you’re too young, too old, don’t live in the right place, or don’t have enough experience? With conclusions like that, you’ll probably find yourself wanting to stay in bed frequently.
Recognize where you have decisions in place that set you up for crankiness and let them go. It’s as simple as choosing something different, but you have to take a look at what you’ve decided and acknowledge other possibilities exist.
Be willing to be in total allowance.
Whatever you’re feeling, whatever is going on, what if you just allowed it without trying to fix anything? Instead of trying to be or feel “right”, give yourself total freedom to just be where you are.
This also applies when it’s someone else who’s cranky. What if you don’t need to fix anything? When you just allow someone to be where they are, it grants them the space to work things through in their own way and time. If you have expectations that someone should change, what does that create?
Have you ever noticed how children don’t question themselves when they’re in a bad mood? They just are–until they’re not. They don’t have the point of view that they should be a certain way and they don’t judge themselves for how they’re feeling. Children are in total allowance.
Don’t conclude, ask.
Sometimes it’s a day where staying in bed is exactly what’s required. But before you just bury your head in the blankets, ask “If I choose to stay in bed today, what will that create?” It might be that it’s exactly what you need. The extra rest and disconnect may be a necessary reset. However, when you ask the question and are willing to really be aware of what your choice will create, you may discover that it won’t actually provide the change you’re looking for. Perhaps there’s something that needs to be looked at, or maybe going for a jog would be a better option.
You can also ask what choice you can make that will create the most. Even with a strong desire to hide, it’s possible that getting a few things done or adding something new to your day is what will chase out the dark cloud and allow you to find clearer state of ease again.
Choose in 10 second increments.
Whatever you choose, you don’t have to choose it indefinitely. You might lie down on the sofa for three minutes and then it’s time for something else. Instead of deciding at 7:00am that you’re not moving all day, keep asking questions and choose again. You can choose to get up, power through six things, and then go back to bed.
Keep asking what will create the most, and keep choosing what works for you in the moment.
Ask, Who does this belong to?
If you wake up on Monday morning and are greeted with a huge wave of not wanting to do anything, you may be picking up on everybody else’s story. Think about how many people around the world dread Monday mornings–or most mornings. Acknowledge how aware you are and whether what you’re feeling actually belongs to you.
This is one of the simplest tools and the most effective. Once you recognize that the urge to perpetually hit the snooze button isn’t actually yours, you get to enjoy discovering what you would actually like to choose instead.
We all have times when business doesn’t seem like as much fun. Hiding and grumbling are definitely an option. But give these suggestions a try. Not only will they create more ease on those days, but they’ll also keep them from showing up as often.
Sometimes the messiest days result in the greatest creation. Be in total allowance and you might be surprised at the business you can create!
If you enjoyed this and would like to find out more practical tools and techniques, check out where Simone is in the world here!
Simone Milasas is a lady who knows how to be a woman, who sees the joy of possibility and future and knows that there is the prospect of possibility in every choice and every new way to see how business is a source for creation. She has owned companies, created them, managed them, and changed them, all with an enthusiasm to invite people to a different possibility in the world. Find out more about Simone Milasas here.